You Can't Fly - - -

[Phoenix Austin McKenzie]

So, his last idea had not been the greatest one ever, but Nix wasn’t going to let that deter him this time. He had convinced Payton to give him another chance before she chose to ignore him far into the afterlife, but now he had to convince her to let him stay in her life as more than just the crazy kid whose light hair made him look slightly albino compared to many of the other in New York. He knew it wasn’t going to be easy, but Phoenix was rarely ever the guy who gave up at the first sign of a roadblock ahead.

He didn’t really have a plan in mind, but he knew that he needed to get Payton away with him first before he could really do anything. She wasn’t the kind of girl who liked surprises and he didn’t know how much it would take to convince her to spend the evening with him. If he had booked a table for dinner or anything else then he might have wasted the effort if she was being as stubborn as ever and still not completely happy to be alone with him again. Nix had told her that he was sorry, that he had only been trying to help, but that didn’t mean that she would accept his invitation for another date with the crazy ass Las Vegas kid.

She wasn’t at the apartment when he called and neither was Paige. He figured the only other place she might be was at the Apollo, working early or something today. He didn’t hear of Payton exploring the city like so many others did and from what Paige had told him in the past, work was practically her life. It was the closest long shot he had, so why not go for it, right? He climbed into his car, his long legs still seeming swamped in the small vehicle that he had driven across the country more times than he could remember, but making it damn near impossible to change his car for a newer model thanks to the hundreds of memories the faded red tin can held for him.
He crossed through the city at a calm speed, his brain trying to get some sense as to what to say to Payton to make her agree to this date in the first damn place. It wasn’t like this was something he did well, on the rare occasion when he did do it. Though, with Meg falling hard for some drama kid, Nix wondered why he should hang about too when he clearly liked Payton and did want to spend more time with her.

Parking his car a block away from the Apollo, Nix locked the contraption and stepped onto the sidewalk, pushing his hands into his pockets as he meandered closer to the theatre, still pondering what to say to her. There were a few things in his mind that they could do, but he wasn’t sure if any of them would be in Payton’s interest. She revealed so little about herself that aside from asking Paige for details, he had to try and guess what she would like. It was like a puzzle, but not the sort Nix was used to. Piecing together clues was wildly different from piecing together someone’s life without having access to files and records that he was not yet qualified to touch.
It was still quiet inside, most of the workers still preparing for the evening ahead. He hadn’t been in here before, but someone soon pointed him in the right direction of where Payton could be found and he took a moment to gather his thoughts and take a deep breath before raising his hand to knock on the door to the office. He paused with his fist in mid air, quickly remembering that she wouldn’t be able to hear it. Slowly, he turned the handle instead and pushed the door open slightly, just enough to fit his head around, hoping that she would be in there and notice him before he accidentally startled her.

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• • •

TAGGED! Payton
WORDS! 715
OUTFIT! Diva Fever!
LYRICS! Stupid Cupid - - - Mandy Moore
NOTES! <3

[Payton Elouisa Rhodes]

Payton had been even more inside herself lately. Her life consisted of waking up, going to work, and going back to bed. But, even the calming atmosphere of the Apollo during the day hadn't been enough to keep her from thinking about what had happened. He was trying to help, and she knew that, but music was something she cringed at now. She could stand the famous singers and the music-ridden halls of the Apollo without a problem. They made her feel closer to her lost dream. But, she wouldn't touch a guitar again, not unless her life depended on it. She would never play again, or sing, and it was something she'd thought she'd gotten over already. Seeing Nix with a guitar in hand, offering it to her with that sincere, honest look in his eyes was enough to re-open the not yet healed wound, and Pay was flailing desperately to get it closed again before she became that moody highschooler once more. So far, it hadn't worked. She was avoiding Paige these days, staying in bed until her sister left in the morning and coming home long after she'd gone to bed. She'd only forced herself into talking to Nix because she knew Paige would be mad if she didn't. Even at work, she wouldn't go out for lunch with the other staff, preferring to stay locked away in her shared office. After a week of it, she was beginning to feel lonely again.

That was probably one of the biggest reasons she'd agreed to going out with Nix again. Payton was lonely, and she knew it, and he seemed like her chance to get out of it. He was a sweet guy who seemed interested in her, so why should she say no? And, though she'd never admit it, she kept thinking about him. What would it be like to snuggle into his arms at night? To really kiss him? Her mind drifted to these questions and more, making her dread and long for the text message that might set up their date. She didn't have anything to lose, so it was worth a chance. If only she could get out of her downward plunge long enough to appreciate it.

Payton reported for work that morning, her bag full of a change of clothes and some lunch/dinner money. She'd order in for both meals and stay cooped up in her office for the day. There was a program that needed to be edited and a few emails to send about getting acts for later in the year, and she'd find something else to fill her hours, too. Tonight, her boss was "forcing" her out into the audience to watch how people liked their singer for the evening, so she'd need to get ready somewhere after dinner, too. But, until then, she was just going to laze around and complete her few tasks. And, definitely not think about Nix.

She walked into the Apollo and nodded to the couple security guards relaxing in their booth near the doors. A few other co-workers waved hello to her and she gave them a tiny smile in return as she made her way back to the office area. She and her boss shared an office, more for the company than anything, she supposed. The theatre could be empty during the day, but sitting together every day seemed to be enough for her boss. Pay unlocked the office door and dumped her belongings on her side of the room. She dug out her dress and hung it up, shaking her head and quickly changing into it. Better to wear it and get some of the wrinkles out than to let it sit all day. She slipped into her heels before plopping down at her desk, tackling her long list of emails to reply to or send. Today was going to be a long day.

Pay hit send on her keyboard as she saw the handle to her door turning. Her boss must finally be in. She conjured up a fake, good-morning smile that instantly disappeared as a familiar blonde head appeared instead. What was he doing here?! Her heart paniked, beating quicker as she stared in shock at him. She continued to stare for a long moment, but finally she found her head. She nodded to a chair in front of her desk, eyeing him up warily and waiting for him to explain why the heck he was here, of all the places to find her.

WORDS: 778!
TAG: Nixxy!
LOCATION: The Apollo!!
OUTFIT: PRETTY GIRL!
MUSIC: Oh Darling by Plug In Stereo
NOTES: <3 <3 <3

[Phoenix Austin McKenzie]

Nix had messed up, big time and there was no feeling in the world worse than the one he was feeling right now. The guilt and pain he felt for hurting Pay and trying to force her into something she wasn’t ready for was keeping him awake at night, keeping him distracted during class and stomping on his usual hyper mood until he could find a way to make it up to her. He could be overbearing and he forgot that not everyone was enthusiastic or as carefree as he was, but he never meant to hurt Payton. Ever.

He wanted to make things easier for her, show her that the world didn’t have to be such a bad place since she had been sick. There was still every chance that she could chase dreams and make herself happy. The only thing holding her back was herself, and Nix wanted to change that and make her believe in herself and the magic of the world again. For him, it was so much easier to see the greatness in every little thing and he saw it even more so in Payton. She was a fighter of the rare variety and he just wanted to give her something back to make her see that life could be easier than what she was making it out to be. He wanted to convince her to give living a chance and not lock herself away in that shell of hers anymore. In fact, he had made his mind up. She could push him away all she wanted, but he’d keep trying to get back in, no matter what.

Phoenix slipped into the office and took the seat, but not before flipping it around and sitting on it backwards. He felt more comfortable like that and it was easier for him to do this when he was feeling like himself, rather than claustrophobic in an office that he had never stepped foot in before. He needed to get this right and it wouldn’t be easy as it was. Nix usually had a terrible case of foot-in-mouth syndrome at the best of times so there was every chance that he’d mess this up too and make the situation even worse than it already was between them. He stared at the desk for a few seconds, his fingers toying with his nose ring as he gathered his thoughts and took an unusually long time before he spoke. “I’m no good at apologies. I never really know when I owe them, but I know that I hurt you and I never meant to and I want to make things good between us again.”

[/color] He pursed his lips and sighed before meeting Pay’s dark eyes with his light blue ones. “I’ll do anything to make this better Pay. Will you let me take you out again? Dinner? Or a walk?”[/color] He wanted this to be okay and he wanted her to come back out of that shell that she hid in.
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• • •

TAGGED! Payton
WORDS! 534
OUTFIT! Diva Fever!
LYRICS! Stupid Cupid - - - Mandy Moore
NOTES! <3

[Payton Elouisa Rhodes]

Since their last meeting, Payton hadn't been able to shake the horrible, sinking feeling of pure terror. Seeing Nix with a guitar, offering it to her... it was petrifying to her. She was afraid of what Nix could offer her and she had a phobia of musical instruments these days. She couldn't even help unload acts at the Apollo; watching beautiful music creators being toted inside was too hard for her. It was too sharp to bare, no matter how strong she seemed. Pay still couldn't do it. She couldn't play again, or even risk talking. To her, her voice was lost forever, just like her ability to make music.

Staring at Nix, it was impossible not to recall the last time she'd seen him. She had run out of the room, through the apartment complex and as far as she could through the crowds outside. She'd needed to get away from him before he saw her cry. Once she was outside in the comfort of the pulsing streets, that was what she did. Tears flowed endlessly down her cheeks as she made her way back to her own apartment, and she'd stormed away from Paige the second she'd gotten home. Unknowningly it seemed, Nix had re-opened that tiny piece of her that still grieved over the fact that she'd given up on the world. Now, it was hard to get it to shut back up and as she looked at him, it clamoured louder than ever. What the hell was he doing to her?!

Payton waited for him to begin talking. Her eyes didn't leave his face, her fingers didn't fidget, and she became a statue, simply watching him as he took his time to get settled. The expression on her face was blank but, inside, she was going nuts. Her heart was fluttering, stomach twisting into knots, and she swore her head was about to explode from how nervous she was getting. No; she had to stay cool and composed, though. The moment his lips began moving, her eyes were glued there, translating the sounds into words, words into sentences, sentences into thoughts. From the look on his face, he was as nervous as she felt, but he was also hurting because she was. Even if it'd been his fault, Pay didn't blame him. Plus, with that look on his face, she doubted she'd be able to blame him for anything.

As she figured out what his question meant, her composure cracked. He was asking her out again... this time in person and for what appeared to be a real date. Pay's brow creased with hesitation as she blinked at him, the pros and cons tumbling in her mind. If she went with him, would he force her into facing fears she wasn't ready to overcome yet? Or, did he mean he was sorry and that he'd stop? Was this her chance at finding some small piece of happiness again? Would it lead to more heartbreak later on? No. For once, she was going to take a chance again. If it hurt her, it could be added to the list of problems already plauging her young mind.

Payton grabbed a pen and sticky note from her desk, writing two words before showing it to him. "No music." Her eyes turned back to his, and she nodded her head as her agreement to whatever he had planned for them. If this failed, there was a strong possibility of her winding up back in her office, crying into an expensive dress.

WORDS: 617!
TAG: Nixxy!
LOCATION: The Apollo!!
OUTFIT: PRETTY GIRL!
MUSIC: Oh Darling by Plug In Stereo
NOTES: <3 <3 <3

[Phoenix Austin McKenzie]

Nix had been crushed when he had seen Payton’s face when he had tried to surprise her. He had figured that maybe she was just nervous, that if someone offered her the chance she might take it again. Phoenix had never been more wrong in his life and it wasn’t like he wasn’t used to it either. He was a little dozy to regard other people’s feelings every now and then, but this time with Pay had been the worst in his whole life and it was up there as his biggest regret. He hated seeing the pain in her eyes, the fight not to cry and the horror at what he had done. There was no worse feeling for the lanky man to experience.

He didn’t handle this sort of thing well and he knew that he had to be careful now; any of his usual attempts to make someone feel better could potentially backfire and ruin what they didn’t even have between them just yet. His wacky personality could be overbearing at times and he reckoned that it didn’t help the situation with Pay all that much either. She was back in that shell of hers and he was still as outlandish as ever, with no excuse to really explain it. He just hoped that she didn’t hate him right now.

Luckily, it seemed as though she was willing to give the peroxide blonde forensic scientist the benefit of the doubt and another chance to make this right and prove to her that he wasn’t such a total jackass. He was still determined to help her face her fears one day, but he wouldn’t push her into anything before she was ready ever again. Not everyone was as comfortable to face their demons as Nix seemed to be or wanted the rest of the world to be. Right now, he would just be content with making her smile again. “No music; not even my incredibly awful singing.”

[/color] He said, hoping the small joke wouldn’t upset her too much. He didn’t want her to feel like she was missing out because of her lack of hearing, though he knew that she might already feel that way. “But, I can’t promise no dancing.”[/color] It wasn’t a necessity for there to be music to dance along to and if Nix couldn’t bring the music back to Pay’s life, he was going to bring her that belief instead. “Are you busy now? We could grab some lunch at the park if you like?”[/color] He suggested, hoping he wasn’t getting too hyperactive too suddenly for her. He knew he could go from quiet to uncontrollable in less than five seconds at the best of times and right now he was just so happy that Pay was giving him a second chance to prove he could be good for her.
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• • •

TAGGED! Payton
WORDS! 479
OUTFIT! Diva Fever!
LYRICS! Stupid Cupid - - - Mandy Moore
NOTES! Icky >.< <3

[Payton Elouisa Rhodes]

Payton had taken more steps than anyone actually realized. They were baby steps, of course, but they had been taken when she moved to New York. Her job was the biggest one of those steps, and she never regretted taking that leap. The Apollo was a house full of music; singers, bands, musicians. She was surrounded by them day and night, watching each of them smile with the joy she'd once had towards her musical career. It was hard for her, especially when anyone brought out a guitar, but she endured it with a professional smile and a half-hearted clap at the end of the performance. No one knew how much it hurt her though; not even Paige.

She was wary about trusting Nix now, after the big scene that had occured last time. Pay was hoping he wouldn't try that again, ever. It may've been slow to everyone else, but she was recovering, day by day. It was at her own pace, though, and not anyone else's. This was her battle to be won alone; no army could back her. If that meant hiding in her shell and creeping out in tiny steps, then that was how it was going to go. She wasn't going to rush herself, or let other people push her into "getting over it." How does someone "get over" losing their entire identity, entire life? Pay hadn't found a way too yet, but she was getting there. Eventually, maybe, she'd be back to some twisted form of her old self; she just hadn't had enough time yet.

A small smile was on her lips at his joke, her head nodding slowly in answer to his question. She could take a long lunch break and still have plenty of time to come back and prepare for the events of the evening. A date with him would probably make the night a lot more bearable, as well; if everything went okay, that is. On the same sticky note, she scribbled again in her flouncy handwriting. "I'd like that. I've got an hour or two to spare," she wrote, flipping it so he could read it. Payton's smile grew somewhat, still small and still hesitant, but it was wider. She got up out of her desk chair, quickly tossing a notebook and a few pens into her bag. She quickly wrote a sticky-note message to her boss, sticking it on his computer screen across the room before grabbing her coat from behind her desk.

Once she'd gathered her things, she looked back to Nix, and nodded towards the door. Hopefully, this went well, or she was going to be regretting this for a very long time.

WORDS: 471!
TAG: Nixxy!
LOCATION: The Apollo!!
OUTFIT: PRETTY GIRL!
MUSIC: Oh Darling by Plug In Stereo
NOTES: <3 <3 <3

[Phoenix Austin McKenzie]

Nix had had a relatively simple life. His family wasn’t loaded, but they didn’t have to scrimp and save every last penny in order to put food on the table either. He’d never suffered any major losses, wound up in hospital or gone through anything emotionally traumatising. In fact, if he had to write an autobiography, it would probably be boring and devoid of drama. All he had were happier memories and insane tales from the trips and adventures he had had when he was younger; most of which consisted of foolish camping trips and getting lost because no one had packed a map. It was teenage shenanigans of the comedy movie variety and whilst they always provided him and others with a good laugh when needed, he knew that he hadn’t exactly been through many of life’s lessons that would shape or define his character.

It was probably why he didn’t think many things through before he put them into action. He didn’t take the time to think about how anyone else may see it. He had thought that by helping Payton confront her ‘fears’ and demons he might help her, but apparently no one worked quite the same way he did. His old fear of needles had been overcome by piercing his nose; something his mother never forgave him for. Nix took everything head on though, which made it so much harder for others to understand or keep up with his often sudden decisions and ideas. In fact, only Meg so far had been able to hang on when he was in a whirlwind of brilliant thinking and spontaneous planning. Most of the others just sat back and watched it happen, going along whenever he cornered them and spoke at the speed of light until they gave into the incoherent speech, just in the hopes of shutting him up!

At least now he had a chance to redeem himself with Payton, who obviously moved at an entirely different speed to the white blonde male standing before her. Still, a chance was a chance and they could work on compromises each time he went and messed something up; which he would do again, because he was Nix and that was one of his many talents. The grin practically took over his face and he wasted no time in reaching out and grabbing Payton’s hand. It was like someone had opened the floodgates and all that excitement and hyperactivity that had been locked away whilst he was being uncharacteristically sombre came rushing out. He dragged her from the theatre and once out on the street he swept her into his arms and spun her around, hugging her tightly in a tradition Nix bear hug, his lips smacking against her cheek in one of his usual kisses. “To the park!”

[/color] He declared, pointing in entirely the wrong direction before dragging Pay in the right direction, his hand in hers as he bounded into a skip that had people staring at him as though he had just escaped the men in white coats. He wanted to see her smile and take the weight of the world from her shoulders and skipping was always a merry way to travel when the day was less than perfect. “Forget about everyone else.”[/color] He encouraged, looking at her with a lopsided smile as his slowed his pace down for her.
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• • •

TAGGED! Payton
WORDS! 597
OUTFIT! Diva Fever!
LYRICS! Stupid Cupid - - - Mandy Moore
NOTES! <3

[Payton Elouisa Rhodes]

Now that Pay's voice was forever stuck in her own head, she thought things through. Words, actions, relationships; everything really. She had the time now. Since she couldn't hear the world outside of her, like the cars, and people, and birds, she created sounds inside her own mind. Mostly, it was with herself, talking like some insane lunatic with an imaginary friend. But, for her, she was occasionally her only friend. There was Paige, and Pay knew her twin would be there for her until their dying days. It wasn't enough though. There were feelings that Paige wouldn't understand because she'd never been faced with what Pay had; the other Rhodes girl had it good. So, Pay created someone to be there for her, to talk with and lean on. That "person" slowed her down, made her think twice before she ran off into the sunset. But, when Nix was around, there wasn't time for second-guessing. She was lucky if she got a "yes" or "no" in!

Payton was startled when he grabbed her hand and dragged her out of the theatre, but she didn't have time to worry about anything other than not tripping. She half-waved a goodbye to the other people in the halls, more focused on where Nix was taking her to and if he was talking. His lips weren't in full-view so she couldn't read them and it made her nervous. Sometimes he talked so fast she was lost in seconds, making her feel stupid and awkward when she had to ask him to slow down for her.

Eyes widening and her hands clutching frantically at his chest, Pay made a mouse-like squeak as Nix scooped her up off the ground and spun her. She looked at him with big eyes, torn between being very amused or very afraid. His lips were against her cheek, then moving too quick for her to make out the words before she was dragged off in another direction. She had to shuffle to keep up with his fast-paced skip, but, gently, she pulled on his hand to get him to stop. Giving him a very small smile, she held up a hand to say stop, mouthing, "Slow down." Pay's eyes pleaded with him. If this was going to work, they had to move at a pace that was comfortable for both; slower for one and faster for the other.

WORDS: 421!
TAG: Nixxy!
LOCATION: The Apollo!!
OUTFIT: PRETTY GIRL!
MUSIC: Oh Darling by Plug In Stereo
NOTES: <3 <3 <3

[Phoenix Austin McKenzie]

Phoenix didn’t quite know why he was so light hearted and carefree. His professors often joked that it wouldn’t be long before all of that would change and that once he saw the brutality of some of the crime scenes he would one day step foot in, he wouldn’t find so many things to smile about. Nix begged to differ though. He knew how awful the world could be and he wasn’t afraid to stare into the abyss, but there was part of him that was determined to never let it follow him around like some dark shadow. He’d never be able to turn back the time and stop the crimes from happening, but his work would help lock so many terrible people away and if that wasn’t something to smile and grin about then he didn’t know what was.

He could be serious when the time called for it, but Nix hated having to act as though he carried the world on his shoulders and held the responsibility for everyone in it. He rarely wanted to hold responsibility for himself! Life was so much better when he got to clean up his messes later rather than miss out on fun because of the consequences he may or may not suffer from it. People were often surprised by his choice in major and his dreams for the future, but there was a lot more to Nix’s hyperactive personality than most people thought, but he was never the kind of guy to discuss his reasons for doing something. Most of the time it was because he didn't know them, but there were definitely things that he just kept to himself just so he didn’t have to explain everything to random people who he met – and he met a lot of them.

He slowed his pace when Pay tugged on his hand and turned around to see what the problem was. Being Nix he hadn’t realised that he was moving at his usual fast pace and his lanky body often strode paces ahead of others without him even meaning to do it. She wasn’t the first person to ask him to slow down, but Nix didn’t work ‘slow’. He needed to move, needed to keep going and find a way to work at the speed he was used to. He knew he had to make this work though. He had to. He took her other hand and pulled Pay closer to him, a small smirk twitching on his lips. “If those heels are going to cause you grief, I can always give you a piggyback ride?”

[/color] He had noticed her shoes before they left, but he hadn’t put much thought to them until now and he didn’t want her feet blistered and aching by the time their date was over.
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• • •

TAGGED! Payton
WORDS! 500
OUTFIT! Diva Fever!
LYRICS! Stupid Cupid - - - Mandy Moore
NOTES! <3