Holding On • •

[Gabriel Pearce Fitzpatrick]

Walking across the city, Gabe felt his chest tighten, his mind raced and his knee throbbed from exerting himself too much with the last twenty four hours. He knew taking the subway would help his health more, but the fresh air was the next best thing to a swimming pool and he needed the time between Fallon’s place and the apartment he shared with Myles to calm himself down. He knew that the second his saw his roommate he’d probably tell him everything; keeping secrets were not his best talent and when it came to Myles, he had learnt long ago that the Boston born man would always manage to snoop out the answers he wanted.

He still couldn’t believe what had happened and how casual Fallon had been about it all. His chest tightened again and he pushed his hair from his face. He was still torn about what to do now, but he was still adamant on getting out of the city for a few days to clear his head and put his mask back in place before confronting Fallon again. His emotions were too raw right now and part of him wanted to turn around, chase Fallon down and kiss her senseless, just to show her that last night wasn’t some meaningless night of comfort. He was convinced she didn’t feel the same though and he needed to preserve what friendship they had left.

Soon, he was near his apartment building and his feet felt like lead. If he went in there, he would have to tell Myles. If he told Myles then it would be the first time he would have ever admitted that he had feelings for Fallon. The second he told someone that then there would be no denying it ever again and he couldn’t take any of it back, no matter how hard he tried. This was not something Myles would let slide under the carpet, but Gabe was smart enough to know that his roommate wouldn’t take long to realise there was something was wrong. If he went in there now and Myles was home they’d have to talk about this and Gabe’s heart thundered at the thought of spilling the secret he had kept locked away for so long. He didn’t have the first clue what his friend would say, but Gabe had a feeling that he wouldn’t want to hear it when the moment came for the confession to be received.

Taking a deep breath, he walked up the steps to the building and pulled open the door with his key fob, taking the stairs over the elevator to buy him a little more time before the encounter with Myles. If fate was kind then maybe the Pi Kappa Phi brother would be out still after a night on the town, or maybe he would’ve chosen for an early session at the gym. If there truly was such a being as Lady Luck then Gabe would’ve been able to go into the apartment, book a flight to Lincoln, pack a bag and leave with just a brief note by way of an explanation. However, after how last night had come back to crush his heart, he doubted that any of that would happen and he was not surprised at all when he heard the booming laugh of his roommate on the other side of the door. Frozen, Gabe contemplated just leaving town as he was, but sensibility quickly reminded him that his passport and other necessities were inside the apartment, plus he had pets that he couldn’t leave without saying goodbye to them. It really would only be for a few days, he couldn’t stay away any longer than that. Despite the situation being one of the most horrible of his life, Gabe valued his PhD and even if it killed him, he would persevere with it at NYU. Opening the door, Gabe didn’t even bother to try and sneak into his bedroom, which was the one closest to the entrance of the apartment. There was no point and if Myles caught him, then the ribbing would be worse and drawn out much longer before he would finally get a chance to admit to the truth and blow Myles’ mind.

[/size][/justify]

• • •

TAGGED! Myles!
WORDS! 710!
OUTFIT! Shame Walk!
LYRICS! Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - - - Fall Out Boy
NOTES! <3

[myles timothy graham]

WE’RE THE BACK POCKET BELIEVERS,
WE’RE THE LOCALS WHO WENT POSTAL
CALL IT TREASON WHILE YOU CAN

Living with Gabe, Myles had grown accustomed to the intelligent man’s ways. He spent more time reading through books than he did watching the television and he never stayed out all night, not without leaving a text or message first. Even then the only time he came home the following morning was if he had to take care of Fallon after she had one too many drinks at the bar. So, when Myles woke up a little later than normal, he was surprised to find the coffee pot empty, the apartment silent and Mufasa sitting by the door of his owner, waiting patiently for the morning walk. It didn’t take much for Myles to grow suspicious and after knocking on the closed door, he peaked inside, grinning when he saw the made bed without Gabe near it.

Gabe’s date must’ve gone well. Myles didn’t recall the door opening and if he wasn’t back by now he could only assume that it lasted all night and that the gangly know-it-all would be trying to sneak back in at any moment. Well, Myles, after making himself some coffee and breakfast had every intention on catching him out and ribbing him like he would have done in the Greek Row days. Not much had changed between the two men in Myles’ eyes and Gabe would always be his brother in the Greek sense, no matter what happened. They were both very different people, but their bond was unbreakable and the idea of a bromance was the only way to best describe them both.

When he heard the key in the door, Mufasa and the cats came to life, knowing the likelihood of it being their rightful owner was almost a certainty. The grin crossed his lips before he saw the Doctor-to-be and the door wasn’t even closed before the usual banter started up. “Well, look who’s doing the walk of shame, and at this hour of the day!” Blocking the path of his roommate, Myles had every intention of extracting all the details from the bookworm before letting him get on with the day. “I take it the date went well? Kelli must’ve been one hell of a catch, man.” He said, making it known that this was the kind of topic that he wasn’t about to let slide. Myles had all the time in the world too since it was his day off. He felt a day of guy talk and banter was exactly the thing for them both. He was a little surprised that Gabe wasn’t grinning or even looking like his usually happy self. His dark eyes often gave a lot away and Myles hadn’t seen this broken look in a very long time. He must’ve gotten lucky though, right? Why else would he have been out all night? “What happened, Tricks? Did she have a boyfriend?” It was the only logical assumption and if it was true then Myles was ready to do whatever it took to cheer his best friend up and get him back on his feet.

[/justify]

Word count of 560
Written for Gabe
Listening to This is How We Do by All Time Low
Outfit to come later.

[/size]

[Gabriel Pearce Fitzpatrick]

For as long as Gabe had known Myles, he had never let him down. Both men were there for each other through it all and there was little that they strongly disagreed on. They may have gotten on each other’s nerves from time to time, but there was never a destructive fall out in their history as best friends. It sounded like some sort of miracle, especially if someone saw the teasing they did of each other when they were together. Myles would call Gabe gangly, geeky and stick insect and Gabe would relentless tease Myles for the weights in the apartment and the amount of times the guy went to the gym each week or paraded around their apartment without a shirt on. It all resembled their Fraternity days and Gabe wouldn’t change that for anything in the world and right now, he kind of hoped that Myles would find a funny way for him to look at all of this.

The second he heard the voice of his Greek brother, Gabe knew that he was going to have to confront these feelings, talk about them and actually have a serious moment with Myles, which was something they rarely did. Most of the time they joked, laughed and exchanged various tales of their days. He could probably count on one hand the amount of times they had actually sat down and been serious about something and even then it had been about the likes of college stresses or future plans. Never had Gabe found himself wanting to talk about his feelings with the Boston CSI, but he knew that Myles understood that he was more exposed and vulnerable than many of the Pi Kappa Phis, simply because he wore his heart of his sleeve and followed it more than his head.

Gabe dropped his keys into the bowl and sighed, looking up at his friend with a tired, broken expression on his face. He felt terrible and he realised slowly that by telling Myles about what had happened, there was a chance he may change the relationship between Fallon and Myles, especially if things didn’t get better after his week away. The ripple effect of this situation might tarnish all the great memories the three of them shared and it would be his entire fault for causing Myles to abandon Fallon if things did deteriorate and Gabe found himself unable to be around her at all. Myles still seemed to be asking questions and the mention of Kelli made him wince. If she hadn’t been such a typical New York skank then he wouldn’t be in this mess. If anything, he’d be coming home now with a smile on his face from a night of non-complicated sex with a woman who might hurt him, but who could never make him feel the way Fallon had made him feel when she acted as though last night never happened. Gabe bit his lip, looked up at the curious face of Myles and then bit the bullet, treating it like a Band-Aid removal; the quicker the better. “I slept with Fallon last night.”

[/color]
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• • •

TAGGED! Myles!
WORDS! 559!
OUTFIT! Shame Walk!
LYRICS! Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - - - Fall Out Boy
NOTES! <3

[myles timothy graham]

WE’RE THE BACK POCKET BELIEVERS,
WE’RE THE LOCALS WHO WENT POSTAL
CALL IT TREASON WHILE YOU CAN

For the duration of time that Myles has known Fallon she had almost always been with or around Gabe. At first he thought his Pi Kappa Phi brother had been keeping his relationship with Fallon a secret, but the day he planned on mentioning it to his new brother had been the same day he had been introduced to Brad. Obviously, there was a slight rivalry there thanks to the opposing Greek House, but for Myles it went deeper than that. He saw how Gabe changed that day; it was subtle, but he noticed it. He never deliberately called Gabriel out on it, but he knew that his friend had harboured a small crush on the blonde woman who soon quickly became part of the furniture at the Pi Kappa Phi house. He had simply figured that Gabe had gotten over whatever feelings he had because very quickly Fallon was almost always around him and the pair acted as though their friendship was as strong as ever.

For a man who got paid to solve mysteries with hard scientific fact, he had a hard time believing that he had been so blind to the truth for all these years. Even since Gabe had moved in with him, it was just like college and he hadn’t made a move on Fallon after her heinous breakup with Brad so why would this happen now? Myles was more surprised at his own obliviousness than that of Gabe’s. In fact, as his roommate’s words sunk in, he realised just how much sense it actually made. All the clues fell into place and if this had been a crime then it would’ve been wrapped up neatly with a damn bow on top too! Fallon almost always went with Gabe, they spent too much time together at NYU and Gabe had always done anything she needed him to do. His memory took his back to Greek Row and the pool the brothers had on back after Brad was out of the picture; there was a lot of money riding on Gabe’s relationship with the blonde girl, especially after she came to him the second the breakup had happened.

He knew his friend was distressed by what had happened, but Myles couldn’t hide back the boyish smirk on his lips. “It has been seven years coming, Tricks.” Worrying about this was exactly like the gangly scholar, but Myles hoped that he could calm him down and reassure him before he had a meltdown. “Even back on Greek Row everyone saw it. The Pi Kappa Phis had a betting pool going. I guess all I can say is congratulations.” He suddenly realised the bulk of this story was missing. His dark eyebrows came close together as his arms folded and he looked at the dog that was still waiting for his master to greet him properly like he usually did. “Wait. What happened to Kelli? How do you go from a date with her to rolling in the sheets with our very own Tinkerbell?” He asked. Myles didn’t see what the problem was. He thought that the day those two slept together would be the day that would shape their lives. Neither of them were the kind to embark on a meaningless one night stand and when it came to Gabe and Fallon, nothing was meaningless. There was a lot of this story missing and he sensed that Gabe was still freaking out about everything. Never before had he seen the slightly taller kid looking so numb, so broken. What had she done to him?

[/justify]

Word count of 647
Written for Gabe
Listening to This is How We Do by All Time Low
Outfit to come later.

[/size]

[Gabriel Pearce Fitzpatrick]

Gabe didn’t know how he had managed to keep a lid on his feelings for seven years when they were suffocating him right now. He was overwhelmed by just how strongly he felt for Fallon and it felt as though there was a weight pushing down on his chest, breaking his heart and every other part of his spirit. Even with Myles’ presence providing him an escape from his thoughts he knew that he would have to relive the night in order for Myles to understand what was wrong right now. All he wanted to do was go home and get out of New York for a little while until he could put a lid back on the Pandora’s Box that had been torn open the night before.

Looking up at Myles with a confused expression Gabe began to wonder if everyone saw it long before he did. He thought it was all under control back in college and he did everything he could to get over her, but clearly none of it worked. Even now, all he could think of was last night; the way she made him feel, the touch of her soft hands and the taste of her kisses as he finally got to hold Fallon in a way he had only ever dreamed of before. “Wait, what? You knew that I had feelings for her?!”

[/color] Gabe really would’ve appreciated the heads up before last night had happened. At least if he had someone winding him up about it, it might not have come and shocked him so much and exploded the way that it did between them. The sudden manner in which it all happened was what made this morning so much worse, at least that was what he thought. Slowly, the rest of his friend’s words fell into place and Gabe’s broken attitude transformed into one of anger too. “You guys had a bet going?! Myles, what the hell?! “Congratulations”? Do you really think I’d be standing here, like this if you owed me a congratulations?!”[/color] Gabe stormed into his bedroom and lifted the case from the overhead of his wardrobe, tossing it onto the bed before grabbing fistfuls of his clothes and throwing them into the black rectangle. “I feel like shit! Whatever I had with Fallon is ruined and there’s no taking it back now! I messed this up and I…”[/color] He stopped and pushed his hair back, biting his lip hard and trying desperately to control his emotions before they got the better of him. “I don’t know what to do now. I can’t go back to just being friends with her.”[/color] He looked across at his roommate and hoped that his eyes told him what his tongue was too afraid to say.

He dropped to his bed and put his head in his hands, the events that led up to that amazing night unfolding in his mind once again. “Kelli was a grade-A skank who left with the bartender. I was drunk and pissed off at everyone. I went to Fallon for answers about why most of my dates were total failures and…well, one minute we were chatting and the next she was on my lap, kissing me.”[/color] He explained, the pang in his chest coming back again. Needing a distraction, Gabe continued to throw his belongings into his case. The quicker he got to Nebraska, the quicker he could start putting himself back together again.
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• • •

TAGGED! Myles!
WORDS! 617!
OUTFIT! Shame Walk!
LYRICS! Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - - - Fall Out Boy
NOTES! <3

[myles timothy graham]

WE’RE THE BACK POCKET BELIEVERS,
WE’RE THE LOCALS WHO WENT POSTAL
CALL IT TREASON WHILE YOU CAN

Myles had always considered Gabe a genius until this moment. For a guy who wore his heart on his sleeve, who could quote ancient tales of epic romances and who had almost fallen more times than Myles cared to think about, he had expected Gabe to be a little less clueless about his feelings for Fallon. Hell, if everyone else around them had been able to tell from the first moment they saw them together then Myles had hoped that his scholarly brother would have an incline of a clue about his love.

He shot his best friend a loaded look. Did he really want him to answer that question? Letting out a sigh, Myles’ shoulders slumped and he shook his head. “Tricks, everybody knew it. You’ve never looked at another girl the way you look at Fall; not even the girls you dated for a short while.” He couldn’t believe he was standing here pointing out something so painfully obvious to a guy who was a short time away from receiving a PhD. He still couldn’t believe how worked up Gabe was getting over this. Surely sleeping with Fallon couldn’t be such a terrible thing; she was gorgeous, but Myles had always seen her as Gabe’s girl. “Jesus, Tricks, calm the hell down! It was Greek Row fun and games; there’s no need to go nuclear about it.” He told him, refusing to fight with his friend over what appeared to be Gabe’s foolish mistake. “Why are you freaking out?” He watched with curious and concerned eyes as his roommate stomped into his room like a teenager, widening them when he saw the suitcase and clothes emerge. “Tricks, what are you doing? Running away?” Myles caught the look in the dark eyes of his friend and shook his head. He didn’t realise just how bad Gabe had it for the tiny blonde and it would seem that seven years was too long for a crush to remain just that. He had it bad for her and the love was just as visible as the broken heart was too. “I’m sure a few days and it’ll be fine. You talked about this, right?”

Myles leaned against the doorframe and listened to his friend’s story. He had never heard anything quite like it and his tales of night time escapades were pretty impressive. Forgetting the part about Kelli being just another one of those girls who would’ve broken Gabe’s fragile heart, he focused on the part with Fallon, knowing that was what was bothering Gabe more than the waitress. “So, did she kiss you?” He asked, still wanting more details than what his flustered friend was revealing. He watched as Gabe continued to throw clothes into the suitcase and shook his head, running his fingers over his face before stepping further into the room to block the skinny scholar from his case. Gabe really needed to calm down and think for a few moments. “Tricks, man, what is the big deal? I’ve never seen you freak out like this before. I would’ve thought that bedding Fallon would’ve made you a happy guy.” There was a large component of this story missing and it didn’t take four years of forensics and another three working with the NYPD to figure that out.

[/justify]

Word count of 603
Written for Gabe
Listening to This is How We Do by All Time Low
Outfit to come later.

[/size]

[Gabriel Pearce Fitzpatrick]

He couldn’t believe this. He couldn’t believe that those who were closest to him had been speaking and commenting on this for years. Fallon had been a friend to them all – more to him – but there was nothing that gave Gabe the slightest clue about what might have been said when she wasn’t around to hear those college guys. Pi Kappa Phi had never been a place of gossip or rumours, but Gabe was questioning the very principles of his brothers right now. Usually jokes were made about the guys who were whipped, who gave their letters to their girls, but no one had ever said anything to Gabe about Fallon; they hadn’t even hinted at anything between the pair and now the scholar didn’t know if he should feel betrayed, angry or something else altogether.

He stopped, Myles’ words sinking in and Gabe realised just how true they were. He had abandoned conversations with other girls to take care of Fallon. He had dropped everything to help her home or to make sure she was okay after one too many drinks. How had he not given into these feelings a lot sooner than he had done? They had been there all along and he was just too determined not to listen to them to preserve his heart. He pushed his hair back from his face and sighed heavily, still cramming things into the small case. “No need to go nuclear about my own feelings? Yeah, you’re right. Thanks for betting on my emotions and the girl I love.”

[/color] He said sarcastically, verbalising his feelings for the first time to anyone. He just wished he’d been declaring it to her and in a much more positive way. The morning hadn’t exactly been what he hoped for and he was taking his frustrations out on his roommate. “I’m freaking out because I don’t think of sex as casually as you or the Ancient Greeks did. I’m not some ‘player’ or womaniser!”[/color] He said, not realising that the insult was implicit to Myles and the lifestyle he stuck to as though college was still there surrounding them all. He sighed, staring down at his suitcase before shaking his head, still not looking at his brother, still overwhelmed by all the emotions from the last twenty four hours. “I’m not running away. I just need a break - a week at most.”[/color] He said, waving off the suggestion of cowardice. Finally he lifted his head and met the dark eyes of his good friend. Did Myles even understand any of this and what it meant to him? He wouldn’t do this over any girl. “She acted as though nothing had happened this morning. Woke up, handed me my glasses and then went and burnt breakfast.”[/color] He said, reluctantly remembering the painful memory of the morning just gone.

Only Myles would be focused on the technicalities of the evening right now when Gabe was clearly not in the mood to boast about the night before. “Yeah, she did. Not that any of it matters now.”[/color] He said, shrugging lightly before rubbing the bridge of his nose where his glasses had pinched him. He wanted to get out of there as quickly as possible; Myles’ interrogation was hardly calming his chaotic mind right now. “’Bedding her’? Myles this isn’t a notch in some bedpost. This…it should’ve been more than just a one night stand. I love her and she doesn’t love me. Once again I was tricked, but not by some random girl, no, it was the one who unknowingly has held my heart for the last seven years whilst I tried desperately to ignore that little fact. That is why I’m freaking out.”[/color] Happy with the way the case looked, he flipped the lid down and zipped it shut. If there was anything he had forgotten he could probably get a replacement in Lincoln.
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• • •

TAGGED! Myles!
WORDS! 693!
OUTFIT! Shame Walk!
LYRICS! Nobody Puts Baby In The Corner - - - Fall Out Boy
NOTES! <3